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How can you stay in the present (mentally) – or get to the present? Here are 5 strategies:

1. Breathe. The idea is that you breathe in. Then you breathe out. This helps you to get centered – and somewhere I read that the space between breathing in and breathing out – that’s the present. So actually, right now, breathe. In. Out. In. Out. It’s amazing that we need to be reminded.
2. Stand up straight or sit up straight (if you are physically able to do so). Just pull your head up, straighten your spine, pull in your stomach, and of course, breathe. It’s interesting how making sure we are doing all of these behaviors just pulls us to the present. Apparently there is no chance of multi-minding when we are focused – just for a moment – on standing up straight, pulling our head up and our stomachs in – and, oh, yeah…breathing. Those four tasks take all our concentration and are sometimes enough to break us out of whatever past tense, future tense, or too tense thinking we were in just before.
3. Say, “One thing, right now.” It’s a calming phrase. It helps you to get centered again. “One thing, right now.” “One thing, right now.” “One thing, right now.” Say it over and over as needed. Let people around you know that if/when you get into a “state,” they might help you by saying, “One thing, right now.”
4. If you have an object that helps you focus on the present – then use that. It might be something physical, it might be a picture, it might be a quote. It’s whatever will calm your mind enough to focus on now – just now.
5. Make marmalade. This recommendation comes from D.H. Lawrence’s suggestion: “I got the blues thinking of the future, so I left off and made some marmalade. It’s amazing how it cheers one up to shred oranges and scrub the floor.” The idea, of course, is to take up an activity where you need to be focused. Making marmalade, doing repair, engaging in some kind of intricate work….all of these activities require your focus and that you be present. Figure out what your marmalade activity is.

I promised that these were simple – and they are. Yet, we often don’t apply simple solutions. Give one or more of these a try when you need to bring yourself back to NOW – and see if you aren’t more focused and much more peaceful, too.

Wedding Present Ideas

Bridal Boudoir Photography as a wedding present.

Boudoir photography is a growing trend and more and more women of all shapes and sizes are having these photo shoots. Bridal boudoir photography makes a truly unique wedding present and one of the best times to go for a photo shoot is a few weeks before your wedding day. You can then have the photos printed in a display box or made into an album. This left with a cheeky note to your husband to be saying “Meet me at the altar” will make the best present he is ever likely to get.

So what exactly is Boudoir?

Boudoir photography is more than just showing flesh, it is the art of flirtation through photography. And like many other art forms it allows the viewer to explore the unknown, use their imagination and leave them wanting more. It must not be confused with Glamour and certainly is not pornographic! Your photographer should be an expert in the use of props, lighting and positioning to get the most from your body and accentuate your best features.

What can I expect from the photo shoot?

All photographers conduct their photo shoots differently. They may range in timescale from maybe 1 hour to half a day. It really does depend on who you’ve booked. My advice would be to chat to the photographer either over the phone or in person before booking the shoot. You will then get a feel for how it will all go and importantly how relaxed you feel and how well you will get on with your photographer. A typical photo shoot at my studio will start with a cup of tea or even a glass of fizz together with chat to go over some ideas and themes for the shoot. You will then spend about an hour or so with Laura, my hair and makeup artist, who will completely transform you. The photo shoot itself should take between 1 and 2 hours using a number of outfit changes, props, furniture and backgrounds. You can then go home still looking stunning with your hair and makeup done or hit the town with your girlfriends. A couple of weeks later after the photo’s have been fully edited, you will return to the studio to view your pictures to decide which ones you want and which products you may want to use to display your photographs.

Choosing the best photographer.

This can be a big decision and you want to get it right because as this is for a wedding present you only really have one chance. I would firstly consider if you are happy with either a male or female photographer because this could rule out half of the options straight away. Most importantly you should look at the photographer’s website. This will give you examples of their style of boudoir photography, their props and backdrops and also their hair and makeup.

Nearly everyday of your life you are negotiating for something, usually many times a day. And that doesn’t include the sales negotiations you participate in as your job.

Yet, despite the fact that you spend so much time in negotiations, during the big negotiations, many salespersons don’t employ the effective skill set and tactics that they use in other aspects of their lives.

For example, have you driven a car today? If so, you are negotiating decisions throughout the entire drive. Using your turn signal is a nonverbal negotiation with other drivers about where you want to turn your car. At every stop sign, you were part of a negotiation as to who should be given a turn to go ahead through the street corners.

By learning what works as a small negotiations, you can learn what works at the bigger discussions and negotiations.

There are three key steps in negotiation skills.

1. Know your sales goals -

It’s very difficult to obtain what you want if you don’t know what it is or why you want it. For example, knowing where you want to go in your car provides the focus you need to get to where you are going. And despite this basic first step and how simple it may seem, many salespersons enter into the larger negotiations without knowing what it is they want and why. Remember, the sales process begins way before you have your first conversation with the potential client.

2. Do your research -

Justifying the price for anything from a new vehicle to a corporation becomes much easier if you can show the buyer the item is worth every penny they are about to spend on it.

This means you must be responsible for the research your potential clients don’t have time to do. By doing this, you make the decision to buy your product or services easy for them. Provide them with as much information as you can to justify why the decision you want them to make is the right one. Many potential clients are waiting for a salesperson to bring them an actionable solution to their problems. Do yourself and the potential client a favor, do all the legwork ahead of time. If all they have to do is sign on the dotted line after hearing your presentation, you are more likely to get that signature.